classes have started and they actually make my life easier, which i find funny. i often sit between friends where certain looks can be exchanged and understood. ive been given the privilege of sharing deep conversations of the theological and soul baring genre. i started soccer bible study and have been playing volleyball. i got dinner with my mentor and ive had a chocolate chai latte every time ive gone to work. literally all of my favorite things.
the other day i was talking with some teammates and i mentioned something about portioning out meals to make sure its enough for another meal. the next time we ate together, one of my teammates asked if what she had was enough for a portion. i assumed she was making fun of me so i rolled my eyes. when we got up to leave, she handed me a to-go box, explaining that she wanted to make sure it was enough. you want to talk about being humbled? want to talk about being cared for? it really is about the people around you.
tonight we played north carolina a&t and we won, which was great. lets be real, we've needed W's for a while. but the best part was watching the team really get it. we stopped worrying about who was in, and deserving it, and all the bitterness that comes with that. we were all for each other. we became our own biggest fans. molly got to go in and she killed it. devin got to play and she did SO WELL. watching each player on the court succeed was unreal. i think thats what sports are supposed to be about. character building and learning to be for each other. becoming a better community for each other. looking out for each other. yesterday, i was running on total empty and i couldnt pass to save my life. multiple teammates sought me out to encourage and listen. we can be so powerful in each other's lives.
better love ive seen.
and in reality, ive experienced it too. sometimes when the weather changes, the only appropriate response is to listen to drew holcomb and the neighbors. something about their music makes sense for this time of the year. ive seen them in concert and its unreal. so much passion, so much thought, and so much love. thats what i want my life to be about. ive been listening to ellie holcombs magnolia ep all week and its good to my soul. so much of it is just reminding yourself of the goodness of the Lord. sitting still and resting your head on his shoulder. i smile like im old and weathered when i listen to their music. in some ways i am, but in other ways im young and goofy and restless. and thats good to remember. i am not old or young, i am both. seasoned and naive. both. i like this road. it is winding, like the ones that wrap their ways around my house. i am surrounded by good friends who come to my games, and who meet me for coffee in between those times. saturday night after my game, there will be a bonfire at my house and i cannot wait. i look forward to sharing laughs over a fire in a chilly night.
earlier, i knew that this year was going to be good, but that it would be rough. that is not the same as overwhelming, or destructive. it will still be a year of continuing my journey and learning to love jesus, myself and others. but it will have its moments. it already has in a couple places. my uncle has stage 4 colon cancer, and its sad. our family is a weird one. we're not close, but we're protective and grateful for each other. its my dad's brother in law. which means that out of my dad's family, he's the husband of my dad's only living relative for several thousand miles (the closest are in western canada and california) it is a sad thing, but a hopeful thing too. who knows. i dont. so in the meantime, it spurs me to pray, and reminds me to be thankful of whatever time i am allowed to participate in, because there is always uncertainty in what you will receive.
"i want you to live forever underneath the sky so blue"
faces are funny in sports action shots. love is an ocean. thank you ellie holcomb for reminding me.
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